September 6th, 2009
I have been searching the vast expanses of the Internet (and even the written word) to try to find solid advice on how to be a good father. Jess is now 37 weeks pregnant with our first daughter, so we are apparently officially on Baby Watch.
In some cases I have been successful in my quest: BabyCenter has been an invaluable resource, despite their continued bizarre practice of measuring our baby’s size and weight in fruits and vegetables no one has ever heard of, much less eaten. The Know-How Book for Dads has also been extremely useful. In other cases, my earnest search for knowledge has come up short, like with The Expectant Father, which is apparently a “classic” book about preparing to have a baby, but the only thing classic about this book is its Hitchcockian nature of scaring the crap out of you. No, not recommended.
Anyway, in desperation I recently turned to an unlikely source for advice: photos from my past. There is one family photo in particular that I have been staring at for a while now. Let me show you the photo and then we’ll discuss it on the other side. Sound ok? Good. Here it is: Keep Reading →
Posted in Family | Posted by Rian
August 26th, 2009
Today we woke up to the tragic news of Sen. Edward Kennedy’s death at age 77. Sen. Kennedy’s death is a huge loss to the United States. Like all of us, he was not without his flaws. But unlike most of us, he never stopped fighting for the rights of those who cannot fight for themselves. He leaves behind a legislative legacy in the United States that makes him the most influential senator of our time. But the Kennedy legacy goes beyond that, and the family’s impact on South African history should also be remembered. There are two events in particular that I would like to mention.
Speech to South African youth on Day of Affirmation in 1966
First, the news coverage of Sen. Kennedy’s death led me to the eulogy he gave at his brother Robert’s funeral in 1969. In his eulogy Sen. Kennedy quotes from a remarkable speech entitled “A Tiny Ripple of Hope” that Robert Kennedy gave in Cape Town on June 6, 1966 on the “Day of Affirmation.” Here are some excerpts from that speech – powerful words that may just as well have been spoken yesterday to the current generation of South Africans:
Keep Reading →
Posted in Social Justice, South Africa | Posted by Rian
August 16th, 2009
Two very different articles in today’s New York Times made me think about how our rushed, 24-hour lives might be affecting our concentration and ability to solve problems, so I wanted to write a quick post about it.
The first article is a fascinating profile of Rahm Emanuel, Pres. Obama’s chief of staff. It describes Mr. Emanuel’s remarkable ability to multitask (“He can juggle 20 or 25 things in one day, in part by delegating and in part by picking only the things that matter”). The part I found particularly interesting was this:
Aides estimate he talks with 50 people a day by telephone and sends hundreds of e-mail messages. Phone calls often last a minute or two, just long enough to deliver a point or extract information. E-mail messages are often a word or two.
I smiled at that last part, because it reminds me of a good friend who we always tease because he uses only two words in emails he sends around to his team: “FYI,” or “Thoughts?” On rare occasions he would combine these two words (“FYI… thoughts?”) in which case you would know he is very serious and a proper response is definitely required.
Keep Reading →
Posted in Social Media | Posted by Rian
July 22nd, 2009
I’m not usually prone to blowing things out of proportion… well, ok, yes I am. But this is different. Of all my fears about becoming a dad, the fear of diaper-changing has been the most consistent of the proverbial fear-flies that just won’t be swatted away, no matter how many times I wave my arms around in a really intimidating way. But I’m not completely to blame for this fear. Some recent external factors converged to create the perfect baby poop-storm:
First, a blog post from Dad-Blogs.com (Stocking up on disposable diapers before your baby is born) informed me that most new babies use 8-10 diapers a day! That’s about 250 diapers per month! And I also hear that babies don’t change themselves. So this could be a problem.
Keep Reading →
Posted in Family | Posted by Rian
July 5th, 2009
Dear Third Trimester,
Today you and I met for the first time. I have to admit that I enter this relationship not liking you very much, though. First of all, you are the only thing that stands between me and meeting my baby girl, so for that reason alone I need you to be over as soon as possible. When we first found out Jess was pregnant, I was really happy that we had 9 months to prepare for the whole thing, because it is quite the project to get everything set up. But now that we’re 6 months in, I don’t quite understand what’s taking so long. I think we’re pretty much ready, so if you could just go ahead and speed things along, that would be great.
But there’s another, bigger reason why I don’t like you. It seems that your only goal is to make my wife as uncomfortable as possible, and I’m not cool with that. She read me this from one of her variety of pregnancy books this morning (The pregnancy countdown book):
Keep Reading →
Posted in Family | Posted by Rian
July 1st, 2009
I’m currently re-reading one of my favorite Christian classics: Reaching Out by Henri Nouwen. It was published in 1975, so the last thing I thought it would do is get me to think about Twitter, Facebook, and the boundaries in our lives. But this section he quotes from Henry David Thoreau got me thinking about how open our lives have become:
When our life ceases to be inward and private, conversation degenerates into mere gossip. We rarely meet a man who can tell us any news which he has not read in a newspaper, or been told by his neighbor; and, for the most part, the only difference between us and our fellow is that he has seen the newspaper, or been out to tea, and we have not. In proportion as our inward life fails, we go more constantly and desperately to the post-office. You may depend on it, that the poor fellow who walks away with the greatest number of letters, proud of his extensive correspondence, has not heard from himself this long while.
“The greatest number of letters…” Or the greatest number of Twitter followers? The greatest number of blog post comments? The greatest number of Facebook friends? I am still tempted to say that this is such an old-fashioned view — that the idea that online activity somehow keeps me away from knowing myself better just isn’t realistic. But could there be some truth to this? Nouwen goes on to say the following — and I have to admit that my initial emotion was anger at him for daring to imply that I somehow live a superficial life:
Keep Reading →
Posted in Social Media | Posted by Rian
June 6th, 2009
When journalist Steven Johnson used Twitter to announce his TIME Magazine cover story about Twitter, and I heard that they would use the tweet as the cover of the print copy of the magazine, I thought it was pretty clever. Or way too cutesy, depending on how you look at it. Either way, I was very interested in the article, but I practiced rare restraint and waited for my print copy of the magazine to arrive in the mail (the postal kind) so that I can read it on paper. You know, like in the olden days.
I think my expectations may have been a little too high. Since so much has been written on Twitter, I thought that a TIME Magazine cover story on the subject would have a lot more depth on how it is changing society and the people who use it. Instead, it was a fairly standard summary of familiar arguments that have been made countless times before — how user-led innovation changed a product beyond what the creators intended it for, turning it into a real-time search engine and broadcast medium for the instant web.
And that’s fine if this is meant to be an introduction piece for people who don’t know Twitter well. However, I thought 2 sections in particular missed the mark a little bit, and I wanted to write a quick response to that. Make sure you read the full article first so you have the proper context.
Keep Reading →
Posted in Social Media | Posted by Rian
June 3rd, 2009
I have so many constant and ever-changing fears about becoming a dad that it’s really hard to keep track of them all sometimes. This week’s freak-out session was focused on a particularly big one: The fear that our daughter won’t have a happy childhood. As with most people who have this special gift of the analytical worst-case-scenario mind, I have reverse-engineered this fear to what I think the root cause is. I think it all comes down to this question: Does it matter how nice you are to your baby? Allow me to explain.
If how you treat a baby has no consequences, you could pretty much relax about the first few years of childhood. You could make a bunch of mistakes, but it wouldn’t matter. As she grows up you’d figure it out as you go along, and you’d have the opportunity to create great memories based on her unique wants and needs, thereby ensuring a happy childhood. What happened early on would be forgotten, as if it never happened. Easy! But this master plan all depends on how important the first few years are in a child’s development, and since I know nothing about these things, this was the part where I needed to bring Jess into the conversation.
Now, when I talked to Jess about this, I didn’t bother to fill her in on the thought process I went through to get me to this point of sincere desire to give our daughter a happy childhood. So I think I brought it up by saying something like, “Does it matter if we’re mean to the baby?“ Ok, so maybe a little context would have been nice — but isn’t she supposed to know what goes on in my head by now? Seriously.
Keep Reading →
Posted in Family | Posted by Rian
May 29th, 2009
Yesterday an interesting trend was started on Twitter. It started when Simon Dingle posted the following update:
Want to start a new trend. #SAis – We’re constantly told what South Africa isn’t. I think it’s time to tell the world what SA is. Thoughts?
Well, in true Twitter fashion, we all responded. Pretty soon the #SAis hashtag (short for “South Africa is”) spread like wildfire, and it is really inspiring to read through the posts (you can click here to do a real-time search for Twitter updates with the #SAis hashtag).
The updates are predominantly positive, and I still find it amazing that all South Africans seem to feel exactly the same way about their country. I pretty much nodded my head at every one of the updates. It is a testament to the strength of the culture when there is such unity in our diversity.
I wanted to pull out and post some of my favorite #SAis updates. Here they are:
Keep Reading →
Posted in Social Media, South Africa | Posted by Rian
May 24th, 2009
This is just a short post to let our wonderful friends and family know that our Baby Registry is up and ready to go! This has always been an awkward part of the process for me. I still remember setting up our wedding registry, walking through Bed, Bath & Beyond with that infrared gun, happily shooting away at all the wonderful stuff, but at the back of my mind wondering if it’s really ok to say to people “Hey, look at me! Buy me stuff because I’m special!”
But, oh well, everyone keeps telling me that I should suck it up, have fun, and shamelessly promote the registry, because people actually want to buy you stuff (which I find amazing). So, because I always listen to what my friends tell me to do, Jess and I went out to Babies R Us yesterday and spent 2 hours with that magical infrared gun (see photo).
Jess’s baby shower isn’t until August 8th, but like most nervous first-time parents, we seem to be way ahead of the game. We’re even starting to paint the nursery today (more on that later…). So here are the details…
Keep Reading →
Posted in Family | Posted by Rian
Page 3 of 6 « 1 2 3 4 5 » ... Last »
